The list below is by no means exhaustive.  Feel free to write me with other recommendations.


Gay & Lesbian National Hotline
1 – 888 – THE – GLNH
1 – 888 – 843 – 4564

The Trevor Project’s Coming Out As You Guide.
(Great articles + a discussion board!)
(This is actually really good!)
(“Hey mister, you got a sister?” Love it!)

(Terrific resource for your friends and family who may need support too!)

Online Support Chats or Blogs:

Regional Groups and Centers:

New York:
(I volunteer here and they have great coming out groups and other support.)

U.S.:  Weekly Coming Out Support Call  (See me for details.)

Please email me to get your group listed or if you want to join my telephone coming out support group with gals all over the U.S. who are considering coming out, just like you:


Aimee and Jaguar

But I’m a Cheerleader

Go Fish

Heavenly Creatures

Madchen in Uniform

The Kids are all Right

When Night is Falling

The Runaways (Seems Kristen Stewart is coming out as gay, which makes this even hotter.)

For more movies, see The Flannel Files. I like here descriptions and there’s a few I left off.

TV Shows or Specials:

Tipping the Velvet (BBC special and also an awesome book by fave lesbian author Sarah Waters)

Orange is not the Only Fruit (BBC special based on the book by Jeannette Winterson)

If These Walls Could Talk 2

The L Word (quintessential, though easy to make fun of)

Orange is the New Black

Transparent (Amazon Prime)

X’s and O’s (This was a logo tv show with Vanessa Paradise that can apparently be found on iTunes — It’s not on Netflix.)


This is a good list

There’s more literature than you can shake a stick at!
(please sir, shake your stick another direction.)

Complete Works, Sappho

Collected Poems, HD

Complete Poems, Emily Dickinson

Blood, Bread, and Poetry, Diving into the Wreck, The Dream of a Common Language, What Is Found There, and On Lies, Secrets, and Silence, Of Woman Born, Adrienne Rich

Zami, Sister Outsider, Collected Poems, Audre Lorde

Valencia and The Chelsea Whistle, Michelle Tea

She Had Some Horses, Joy Harjo

Fugitive Colors, In Her I Am, Chrystos

Loving in the War Years, Cherrie Moraga

Trumpet, Jackie Kay

Memory Mambo, Achy Obejas

The Other Side of Paradise, Staceyann Chin

The Pagoda, Patricia Powell

Crime Against Nature, The Dirt She Ate, S/He, Minnie Bruce Pratt

Stop Kiss, Diana Son

And Baby Makes Seven, Paula Vogel

RubyFruit Jungle, Rita Mae Brown

Stone Butch Blues, Transgender Warriors, Leslie Feinberg

Trash and Skin, Dorothy Allison

Movement in Black, Pat Parker

Directed by Desire, June Jordan

Hood and Stir-Fry, Emma Donoghue

Oranges Are not the Only Fruit, Jeanette Winterson

Fun Home and The Essential Dykes to Watch Out For, Allison Bechdel

Work of a Common Woman and The Reader, Judy Grahn

New and Selected Poems, Mary Oliver

The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas, Gertrude Stein

The Well of Loneliness, Radclyffe Hall

Closer to Fine, Meri Weiss

The Price of Salt, Patricia Highsmith

Orlando and Moments of Being, Virginia Woolf

Slip, Sina Queyras

A Cup of Water under My Bed, Daisy Hernandez

Biography of Desire, A Noise from the Woodshed, and Kindling, Mary Dorcey

Living as a Lesbian, Cheryl Clarke

The Borderlands, Gloria Anzaldua

I Must Be Living Twice, Eileen Myles

Head off and Split, Nikki Finney

Everything Is Now, Michelle Cliff

Empathy, Sarah Schulman

The Lesbian Body and The Straight Mind, Monique Wittig

The Lesbian Avengers, Kelly Cogswell

Tales of the Lavender Menace, Karla Jay

Riding Fury Home, Chana Wilson

Intimate Politics: Bettina Aptheker

When We Were Outlaws, Jeanne Cordova

Butch/Femme Reader, Sally Munt and Cherry Smith

Butch Is a Noun, S. Bear Bergman

Genderqueer and The Persistent Desire, Joan Nestle

Brazen Femme: Queering Femininity, Chloe Brushwood Rose and Anna Camilleri

Femme: Feminists, Lesbians, and Bad Girls, Laura Harris and Elizabeth Crocker

Sometimes She Lets Me, Tristan Taormino

Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers and To Believe in Women, Lillian Faderman

A Desired Past, Leila Rupp

Boots of Leather, Slippers of Gold, Elizabeth Lapovksy Kennedy and Madeline Davis

Female Masculinity, Judith Halberstam

Gender Trouble and Undoing Gender, Judith Butler

An Archive of Feeling, Ann Cvetkovich

Queer Phenomenology, Sara Ahmed